Reaching an acceptance

When any parent chooses not to talk about certain things with their child that their child needs to know about, they are actively making a response that will inevitably have negative connotations and a ripple effect throughout that child’s natural life.

Where you’re born with something wrong and you know something’s not right and your emotional needs aren’t met that’s something not easily accepted. I also spent years as a child struggling …

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22 Mar, 2018

A question of respect

This was on my mind today. Something I come back to because I was told by someone close to me many years ago that he demanded respect and I told him that respect was supposed to be earned that it wasn’t something we’re entitled to have just because we demand it.

That just because someone is older than we are, doesn’t mean they automatically deserve to have our respect. Doesn’t respect depend on the relationship and what the other person brings to the relationship? Doesn’t it also depend on the circumstances and whether that person deserves …

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18 Mar, 2018

More layers to the jigsaw

Revealing yet more layers on my Cerebral Palsy diagnosis brings about new and unwanted thoughts. I wake up with thoughts about the process of how I got to this place and know deep down I’m not done yet. Not only was my ‘foot drop’ not referred to in any of my medical notes, but I have now learned that I have it because of a difference in leg length and a paralysis.

I have always known about the leg length difference. The paralysis I didn’t know about, but it does tie in with having no muscle mass or working muscle on my affected side. I have never …

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16 Mar, 2018

Changes along the way

Nothing in my life was ever going to change unless I changed and that’s pretty much how things worked out. If there are problems around our parents that won’t change until they choose to change. It’s the children who must change.

We will always live the life we live unless we understand ‘the life thing.’ The nature of how we are and how we think is responsible, but as my story shows there is a way around that. I could have …

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13 Mar, 2018

My greatest success

I consider that finding out about myself and what I was dealing with that I never imagined I would know this side of life and starting The CP Diary are part of my personal success.

I set up my own secretarial business putting my office and admin skills to good use. I did that for a couple of years and it was enormously successful. But by far, my biggest success has been …

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12 Mar, 2018

Redressing the balance

Sadly, I was still struggling with the fact that I’d failed in school and couldn’t emotionally move on from that. I carried the guilt because I was made to feel responsible.

I had already thrown my school reports away because I couldn’t bear to read them, but not telling myself why that simply added to my guilt. It would go on to take me another 26 years to find …

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8 Mar, 2018

College & early work years

I left school at the age of 16 and having already struggled through my school years I headed for college and struggled to learn once again. I enrolled on a Secretarial course that included additional qualifications in Maths, English and Office Studies, but college for me was merely a continuation of my school years.

College for me was merely a continuation of my school years. After leaving college I moved into the working world and although that didn’t start off too well, my working life slowly improved once …

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6 Mar, 2018

My early life

In some of my Cerebral Palsy blogs, I have touched on various issues around the condition itself, but I’ve not talked about how visible it was when I was a child or how exactly the whole Cerebral Palsy thing played out.

Although it would go on to take me years to find out there was a diagnosis, I never knew. All the difficulties I had eventually took their toll and manifested itself in anger issues. ‘I was an angry child …

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5 Mar, 2018

Our entrance & exit

Some of us will be more affected by our early years than others. Through our background, environment and experiences, some of us will emotionally struggle. Our earlier experiences sadly shape who we are and how we go on to behave.

But those can be no excuse for bad behaviour. But as parents it’s our duty to show children moral practices regardless of our own background. It’s important that whatever issues we …

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2 Mar, 2018


Because I deal with Sensory Processing, I am already prone to anxiety, overthinking and negative repetitive thoughts. Those continue to be my biggest challenges.

The great thing about what I deal with is that I get to document it. That helps me get my thoughts out into the open and that helps me feel better. Anxiety isn’t something we consciously think about …

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26 Feb, 2018