After an unsuccessful weekend, I am feeling somewhat despondent this morning. With no emotional support growing up, I find it hard to be the adult sometimes.
Time has brought me to this place, but it’s all it has done. Emotionally, I don’t always feel the adult. I have become my own guide and mentor and although that helps me cope, it’s also been very hard. It comes on the back of some very tough weeks. I usually pride myself on my coping skills and resilience, not today.
I have missed out on my childhood. I’ve been left with a gaping hole in its wake. Every now and again I subconsciously go back to that place that I was at my most comfortable. I have to grow up and face my realities.
I’m not one to give up or mope around and I will always do my best. I believe as adults we’re expected to get on with things, it doesn’t matter whether we’re up to the job or not. Today I’m not up to the job.