Accepting your imperfections

It would be difficult for anyone to find or have inner peace when they don’t accept they have imperfections. Unfortunately, the desire for perfection and the need for inner peace will always be a source of conflict.

I have seen first-hand what happens, what happens when we feel the need to change something because we want it better than the way we have things now and it doesn’t end well. We need to be grateful and content of the things we have in our lives in the here and now, rather than wanting to change or fix everything all the time, so that we have better and bigger things.

I also believe that the act of focusing on our imperfections takes us away from our goals of having inner peace. I believe that even with the best of intentions, we will never do of our best when we’re attached and focused on the wrong things. Wanting things to be better, means we bring negative thoughts and situations back into the equation.

How many of us validate ourselves on always wanting perfection? We look for perfection, convince ourselves it’s right, when the reality is we should be aiming for the opposite. The idea of a world in which everyone and everything is perfect is nonsensical. Being born with Cerebral Palsy made me less than perfect.

As a child it was because of my parents’ inability to be able to accept that I wasn’t perfect that showed me a different way. Seeing them struggle had the opposite effect on me. There will always be better ways for us to do things, but that’s not the same as having perfection. That doesn’t mean we can’t appreciate and enjoy how we do and have things now.

I believe that we need to consciously bring about our awareness so that when we fall into the habit of wanting to change things for perfection, we tell ourselves that things are fine as they are. We need to remind ourselves that our lives are okay and so are all the other things.

As we begin to eliminate the need for us to be perfect or have perfection in our lives, we’ll begin to discover things that are less than perfect. We need to make peace with ourselves and with our imperfections.

31 Jan, 2012

12 thoughts on “Accepting your imperfections

  1. Imperfections about my character I can accept.

    I had no choice in having CP, that’s what I find hard to accept. I didn’t do this to myself.

    1. I completely understand. I remember being very angry myself as a child because I hated the fact that I wasn’t perfect. As much as it’s hard to come to any form of acceptance on what we deal with, I believe not accepting ourselves makes us feel worse about us and what we have to deal with.

      Sometimes we just have to find a place so that we can accept our imperfections. You didn’t ask for it, you’re right… but you have it. It is the same for me.

      From my own experience as a child, not accepting how I was made me more miserable and even more angry and a nightmare to be around.

  2. I always got the message as a child that even if I was perfect all the time, it wouldn’t matter since my parents wouldn’t have noticed or even cared.

    It gave me the negative perception that it wasn’t even worth trying to accomplish anything in life as far as people wouldn’t even notice.

    I’m only just now starting to be able to move beyond listening to those old tapes that play so frequently in my head. I’m just praying that one day I won’t have so much noise in my head!

    1. This was not about you or how imperfect you were, you were just a child. This is about how your parents dealt with you as a child.

      I believe that if our parents encourage and reinforce all that is positive, we will be encouraged to see ourselves in a more positive light, even if we’re not perfect. I don’t believe any of us are and will be totally perfect, but we need to be of accepting of ourselves and our imperfections instead of trying to make things more perfect in our lives.

      I believe that once you have worked this all out, you will be able to play a different more positive tape in your head!

  3. I tried to be perfect for many years and accepted (a few years ago) that it just wasn’t worth it. Nobody appreciated it anyway except myself. I don’t try for perfection anymore.

    I’m happy with myself and my husband isn’t too disappointed with me.

    1. Ditto Lisa. I have to agree with you. Not accepting our imperfections just adds more to our stress.

      We may never reach a plateau where we’re completely happy with ourselves or our choices, because of some of the stress we have. I don’t believe any of us don’t live with stress.

      I believe though, we need to find inner happiness regardless of whether we’re perfect or not. In my opinion the more imperfections we have the better. If we’re more accepting of our imperfections, we’ll be more accepting of ourselves.

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