Over the last few days, I’ve been trying to work out why I’ve been feeling out of sorts, in other words not my usual self. Control is always a difficult issue to come to terms with.
However, we choose to deal with it, it’s not easy coming to terms with the concept that it’s how our life has been. It’s the act of someone else having and making decisions that include us that we’re not entitled to add or agree with.
Any form of control will leave an imprint on our already damaged souls. As the days, months and years go by, so we will age and as we continue to age, time swiftly moves on, time that we can’t get back or make up. If the control had been in my best interest and it had positively contributed to my emotional development, I would have felt better about it.
I know I could never change those times, so I choose not to dwell on them. Those times were out of my control. It’s the time I’ve lost that I can’t get back that bothers me more and those responsible not knowing how I felt. As I continue to focus on my personal healing, I take comfort from knowing other people’s actions are not personal. We shouldn’t take them as ours.
I continue to draw on my inner resources by bringing my deepest values into my every day sense of self. That always brings me a renewed confidence that I can help myself.
I can’t change what’s gone. All I can do is change my attitude towards what’s gone.