Although it’s not easy dealing with people who have controlling tendencies, part of their control is tied into self-esteem issues. How do we take control from someone who has controlling tendencies?
The following may be helpful:
- Be co-operative with the person who is trying to control you. Show that person you’re are a team player and that you’re both equal and should be treated as such;
- Try to stay level headed when you communicate so that you’re in control of how you handle yourself. Talk about how you feel to the person controlling you, so he is aware of how you feel about his or her behaviour;
- Be strong and try not to show any signs of weakness. People who control tend to control more when they know they are dealing with a weak person;
- Try to re-assert your authority so that person knows you will not be controlled;
- If you use affirmations, positive affirmations help build confidence. Affirmations can be recited any time of day and don’t have to be written down.
In the same way we haven’t got a right to control, no one has a right to be controlled. The need for control comes from a life of dysfunctional behaviour. Those who control will have lived that life or been around others who have perhaps controlled them.