Insecurities & reinforcements

There is no doubt in my mind that any negative issues I deal with, reinforce my own insecurities about certain aspects of my past.

I believe the energy that circulates in my own family because of what we’re dealing with now, is presenting more negativity, which has a knock-on and reinforce my own issues from childhood about my Cerebral Palsy and having no emotional support.

I also believe that subconsciously I am holding on to thoughts that reinforce my beliefs as far back as a child. I see the issues clearly, manage to deal with those positively, but I also see my past negative issues. I am lucky they don’t interfere with me making positive decisions, but they do reinforce my past negativity, on some of the things I had to deal with.

I need to create and be responsible for my own happiness, instead of subconsciously always seeing my past as something that was negative. I believe the negativity surrounding my Cerebral Palsy and childhood is the reason why I still have those negative thoughts. My condition as a child was never embraced or spoken about, so I never learned to embrace it. I need to do that now.

I need to develop the ability to work things out for myself, resolve past issues so they aren’t reinforced every time I have to deal with something in my life now that turns out to be negative.


28 Jan, 2012

6 thoughts on “Insecurities & reinforcements

  1. It does seem that we tend to go back to the past, when things come up that we have to deal with. I do it a lot myself.

    I had the support as a child and wish that you had. Sorry! People deal with things differently. Some get it and deal with it and some don’t, especially parents. Also if your not trained in a medical profession of some kind it is harder to grasp things I’ve discovered from working with parents of medically fragile parents and my own family. Something I think should be easy that’s second nature to me, isn’t to others. I have to learn to deal with these parents that don’t know anything and it brings me back down to earth.

    Keep doing what you’re doing. You handle things so well.

    1. It’s enough Lisa that you wish I had support as a child. I am definitely going to continue doing what I’m doing.

      Thank you for the compliment. That helps.

  2. I can definitely understand what it’s like to have to live with those old tapes constantly repeating themselves in your head. It has taken me a long time to realize when they’re playing and what I can do to change those thought patterns.

    You have helped me to be able to deal so much better with them which I greatly appreciate. I can only hope that I can do the same for you so you won’t have to deal with them when they repeat for you!

    1. Thanks Randy. They’re really just there when I have to deal with anything negative. Most of the time I can forget about them.

      I am pleased I have been a support to you. Being a friend is a support. Thank you.

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