I was never allowed to make any of my own choices when I was growing up. Of course making any kind of choice, takes confidence and the mental ability for us to be able to work through the consequences of making a final decision.
Making good choices allows us to make better decisions. So how do we go about encouraging children to make good choices?
The following tips may help:
- Encourage children to make their own decisions by giving them two or three choices to choose from;
- Work on a couple of choices so that they begin to learn to understand their choices and how to work through them;
- Once they learn how to choose so that they make their own decisions, allow them to choose decisions.
A good starting point would be to teach children about values, because our values usually form the foundations so that we go on to make choices. Without those, I believe we will all begin to struggle. If we, as adults struggle with choices, our children will struggle too. They learn from us.
Of course, without knowing what’s right from wrong, none of this will work. For example, if a child throws an innate object at another child and that child gets hurt, then that decision is wrong. Children need to know if they do something wrong.
Discuss the merits
It’s important to discuss the merits of making decisions based on our choices and explain how those decisions are made. I believe that when we know what we want, we are usually confident about making our decisions, based on our choices. When I started making choices and decisions as an adult, I based my decisions around what other people wanted, which didn’t accord with what I wanted, for myself.
I think as long as parents continue to teach and point out where their children go wrong in a positive way, they will eventually learn how to make choices and decisions that will benefit them mostly and with the right encouragement they will be successful.