My struggles

I am struggling as my sensory problems are beginning to interfere with daily life. If I’d known as a child, what I’d been dealing with for all of those years, I would have at least had a head start in finding a way to deal with these challenges now.

Juggling my emotions around particular sensory issues, such as open spaces and visual distortion are challenges in themselves and can be very scary. I not only feel aggrieved that it has taken me this long to learn about what I should already have known, but bad because the pressure’s always on for me to conform, where I feel it’s impossible to conform.

Any sensory issue isn’t easy to understand. It’s also not one others will find it easy to empathise with. Over the years I have had to learn how to empathise and reconcile with myself.


23 Jan, 2015

6 thoughts on “My struggles

  1. Ilana, thank you for sharing this heart felt post with us. I completely empathize with what you’re dealing with. We are your family and we share your pain as if it were our own.

    Problems with open spaces and experiencing visual distortions must be incredibly frustrating to say the least. Are there any medications available to help you deal with this period.

    1. Awww thanks Tim. I’m not sure whether there would be any medication for what I deal with, but to be honest I’m not sure I’d want to go down the medication route.

      Since this is something to do with my sensory issues of how I view and see the world, I would probably have to stay on medication, which in itself could bring about more side effects.

      As long as I am careful and do my homework so that I am well aware of what I am about to embark on, I’m normally okay. I have to make myself aware and go with my gut, instead of bowing to pressure from others, because that’s normally when I get caught out.

  2. This must be very hard for you as you say; especially as these experiences are all relatively new.

    I guess you’ve just got to go with the flow on these sensory problems and try to make decisions that make life easiest for you. It’s new for others around you too and there will be adjustments to make, but don’t feel that any of this is down to you.

    It’s just something else you’ll have to deal with that you should have known about all along; but deal with it you will, as you always do.

    1. Yes you’re right. My sensory experiences will be new to those around me too; but not everyone is empathetic when it comes to other people’s issues.

      It’s not always given, but it is important to at least try.

  3. I feel for you. Having to deal with sensory issues on a daily basis is hard I know; because our son has sensory processing disorder and it’s a challenge for us.

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