My survival guide

These are my tips that are a culmination of years of practice that are my sanctuary.  They lessen my stress and allow me to focus so I get the job done. I hope they help you too.

  • There is always a different way to look at what you’re struggling with. It’s an attitude thing;
  • Adjust the attitude and mood. It’s the attitude and moods that let you down;
  • We think we’re not always capable of learning. We are. We may just need to find a different way to learn;
  • Stop comparing yourself. You are your own comparisons;
  • If you know you’re struggling on an issue, don’t sit on the issue. Ask for help;
  • We can’t know everything. Accept that you can’t;
  • Getting to grips with something new isn’t easy. Be patient. Don’t expect it to happen overnight;
  • Accept when you’re not okay. That way you’ll move on quicker;
  • We don’t get any brownie points for being stubborn. We get brownie points for dealing with our issues and moving on;
  • Don’t let pride get in the way; or make your pride the reason why you won’t accept help. You may come to wish you had;
  • If you’re studying don’t be afraid to discuss your work with your peers. A different attitude can bring about a different approach to your thought process, which can be helpful;
  • Don’t worry over the things you have no control over and deal with the things you know you can.

17 Sep, 2015

4 thoughts on “My survival guide

  1. I definitely know how to survive, but the thing I have more trouble with is just living!

    My parents didn’t teach me a lot about life skills, so there are still a lot of things I don’t know how to do. Most parents try to set a good example and show their kids how to deal with things, like how to pay rent or take care of their own cars. I half expected my parents to do normal things but should have known better than to depend on them for anything.

    You eventually give up asking for help or anything, when the people you’re supposed to be able to depend on aren’t even able to take care of themselves very well. They trained us well as far as never asking for help, because then people would find out what was really going on at home! My pride and stubbornness also prevented me from asking for help since, in my mind, it felt like I was begging for mercy.

    I was a very angry child and any normal parents would have at least tried to get their child some help rather than bitch about how much it would cost. It makes you very neurotic and unable to contemplate doing things for yourself, like getting a physical or going to a doctor when you’re sick!

    At this point I want to learn how to do more than just ‘survive and/or exist!’ I’ve wasted the majority of my life doing this and have missed out on opportunities that I will regret for the rest of eternity. I have always made choices that were more beneficial to other people, more than they were to me.

    My Mother did a very good job on brainwashing me into thinking that it was always the right thing to do. It wouldn’t matter what I did for people, since it was never enough; no matter how much I did for them.

    What I have to do now is learn to do what I need for myself and not feel so guilty for having my own life!

    1. Sometimes we just have to move on as hard as it is. I think your last paragraph sums up your response nicely Randy. It’s important we learn what we need to do for ourselves, take guilt out of the equation and then move on.

      It also took me many years to remove the guilt. Once you’ve done it, you’ll know, because you’ll feel so much better. I really do hope you feel better soon.

  2. Sometimes I feel like laughing or maybe crying when I see how hard it is to simply survive just to live. But it’s virtually impossible to live unless I know how to survive.

    I guess some people see life as a place to survive and some people see life as a place to live; I don’t see much difference between the two.

    1. Yes I agree, we can live or we can use life to its fullest by getting the best out of what we have. It’s a perception thing.

      Given everything I have had to deal with in my lifetime, I could also just exist, but I remind myself that to just exist becomes fruitless and I know I deserve to have and do better.

      We need to win our own battles, even though the battle we have with ourselves, wasn’t ours to start with. We need to be in control of our lives, to make new choices away from the old ones and to move on without feeling stuck all the time.

      I have every reason to also do as you suggest in your response Tim. We both have, but what good does it do? I think sometimes we have to find a level of acceptance on what happens to us and simply move on, away from those who have wronged us.

      The universe will take care of the rest, when the time is right.

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