Our inner child

I was thinking about my inner child the other day and wondered whether our inner child affected by our past? I believe the answer is Yes. I believe that whatever we see or get to experience in our formative years, we begin to store those inwardly.

If we’re told we’re useless, we begin to believe we’re useless, if we’re not told we’re loved, we begin to question our ability to be loved and then to love. Sadly, our inner child begins to believe everything it’s told.

Our subconscious

I also believe that on a subconscious level our behaviour will affect our relationships. It’s never a conscious decision. We don’t wake up one day and tell ourselves we’re going to be angry towards the people we love. The kind of behaviour I am talking about comes from years of seeing other people’s bad behaviour, which is then stored in our subconscious, played out through our conscious.

I think that when we begin to understand other people’s behaviour, then we will begin to see that the pain we carry is not actually our pain to carry. The pain we feel is the pain we feel because of the way others have behaved with us. I believe it’s called guilt and it’s someone else’s guilt.

Correcting our past

As we begin to correct our past, the void once left inside of us slowly begins to be filled with compassion; love and understanding that we can be those things. Only then will we begin to see that our inner child is special, that our inner child is loved and that our inner child is capable of love.

As we begin to love our inner child, we begin to love ourselves as we slowly begin to let go of the past. When we give hope back to our inner child we give hope to ourselves for a better future, a future without history having to repeat itself on those we love.

27 Jun, 2011

4 thoughts on “Our inner child

  1. My parents always tried to make me feel guilty. I never gave in to them. I felt I did things for a reason because of how they treated me.

    My mother was 90% supportive of me but in one case when I did not agree with her on a major issue she said she would disown me. Thankfully that did not happen.

    As for my father some times it is still a battle but at least we have learned to co-exist without fighting.

    1. It’s a shame your parents tried to make you feel guilty. I hope you see it now for what it was back then and that it wasn’t something you did to make them behave in that way.

      It’s such a shame that your relationship with your father today hasn’t changed. At least you know this was never about you; it’s about your father and his attitude towards you with what you deal with.

      Hopefully what you know will go some way to changing the way you perceive yourself and your father.

  2. I know my parents loved me but weren’t as open with it as I am today. I’ve always told my daughter I love her. It doesn’t matter where we are and I tell others I love the same.

    I think I carry the feeling of not being good enough. My parents hardly ever gave me support in my endeavors. Even as a young adult in college I didn’t get the support I should have. They didn’t tell me they were proud of my accomplishments.

    I also think that has contributed to my will to go and accomplish things. Even if my daughter fails at something I tell her I am proud of her because she tried and gave it her best.

    1. You’re not alone Lisa. I am sure many parents parented like your parents parented you! In your particular case it has helped you motivate yourself to want to do better.

      It has also gone some way to change the way you perceive your own child.

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