How we come through our childhood is very much our responsibility. Childhood can impact our adult lives, particularly in the way we communicate as adults.
The most common form of communication we might struggle with is passive aggressive behaviour. Passive aggressive behaviour is indirectly an expression of hostility, brought about through stubborn tendencies, procrastination and resentment and by our inability to accomplish a task, which we are responsible for.
Unfortunately, anyone who uses this behaviour will follow a pattern of negative attitudes, resisting to the demands of others to follow a task given to them, either in a social setting, through personal circumstances or work situations. Although this behaviour is not specifically linked to childhood, this behaviour is more likely to replicate from childhood.
As a child growing up, I knew not to express my feelings but unfortunately that comes with consequences, as we slowly learn to repress and deny what we feel. Using other channels to express our frustrations may bring about passive aggressive behaviour.
Other traits to this behaviour include our inability to analyse problems, blaming others for our misery, lacking compassion and empathy and using anger instead of communicating appropriately to get our point across. Negative self-talk is also another trait. I’m not sure how much of this we are consciously aware of.
I know that unless we begin to recognise any or all of these traits, it’s not something we change. Through a better understanding of our lives and we have to want to change it, consciously we can choose to do things differently.
The good news is that as it’s us who have chosen to behave in this way, we can re-choose to behave differently if we want to. Any choice we make is ours. We just have to want to change.