I remember a family growing up whose parents constantly put their son on a pedestal from the moment he was born. He couldn’t put a foot wrong. It’s not that he was perfect, but through their eyes, he was completely perfect.
So why are children put on a pedestal?
From what I know, it’s usually done because parents believe their child is perfect. It’s not just a parent thing. Grandparents also do it when they feel sorry or make allowances for their grandchild, either because their grandchild is missing out in some way, or because they believe their grandchild is having a hard time with their parents.
When a parent does it of course, it can be at the cost of another sibling and when a grandparent does it, it’s usually at the cost of another grandchild, but it’s often done either because that child is easier to parent, or because the parents have more of an affinity with that child.
It stands to reason that as soon as any child is put on a pedestal, they will begin to behave as if they are perfect and will continue to live their lives that way. Outwardly, they will seem confident, although inwardly their lives may tell a different story. The more someone is put on a pedestal, the more insecure they become.
In so many cases, the pedestal child is ‘untouchable,’ where they think they know absolutely everything and a parent can’t tell them anything. People who live their lives this way become non-compliant, non-conformist, self-centred, difficult to parent and deal with and think that what they’re given is their birth right and not because they’ve earned or deserve to have it.
Although their lives seem perfect, their lives will be far from perfect. Their spoilt attitude will always dictate how others see them. Unconsciously, they will know they’re spoilt but consciously will find it difficult to change.
Of course, for anyone who understands and sees this behaviour, they will continue to have an enormously difficult relationship with that person.