Anyone like me with a brain impairment means we are disabled, however small. There’s no getting away from that. It stands to reason therefore, that my life would turn out differently, when I eventually got to find out, because I’m tied to a brain injury that has led to impairment. That through my impairment, I would struggle and all relationships would need a different understanding.
Knowing I had Cerebral Palsy as a child would have meant that I could talk about my symptoms and issues with those who needed to know. With any relationship, it’s important to start off level pegging, on the right footing, knowing everything there is to know about what that person might deal with. Sadly, for anyone finding out about a disability later, means the person before the diagnosis isn’t the same person after.
Having to work things out for ourselves and having to find out new things about ourselves, makes it so. We grow through change, we mature, we will begin to see ourselves and our lives differently. Knowing means I have become less frustrated, less agitated, more calm, but knowing can change the way others see us too.
That shouldn’t matter though, because everyone should work and grow together, it shouldn’t matter the start point. But for those of us who deal with a disability our priorities and challenges will always be different and that changes us. Dealing with a disability can be difficult, particularly as we have different challenges to meet, but frustrating for the people we share our lives with.
Dealing with any disability has its ups and downs. Even more frustrating for me when there was little to no understanding of what my challenges were. Although the life I’ve had isn’t the one I would have wanted, I still have many challenges, that present around my Sensory Processing Disorder, but at least now I know more about the disorder.
Even with all of those things I’ve had to deal with, I still choose to strive to see my life more positively. A different kind of knowing with a different life around my disability has brought about a different thought process from me. But we all must have a different thought process, particularly as dealing with a disability can unbalance the equation in any relationship and often does.
Whether a disability is mild or moderate is immaterial. Everyone involved needs to have a different perception on disability, around what that person deals with and run with it, for those relationships to work.