Thoughts on passing

We hold on to our most inner thoughts at the thought of losing someone we love. Growing up my parents seemed to be immortal. When my mother passed, I couldn’t imagine her not being in my life, because I still had my father. Now I cannot imagine a life without him.

As a child, I wasn’t encouraged to explore the possibilities that one day I might have to deal with illness or someone’s passing, let alone deal with my parents’ illness or passing. I was completely shielded from anything to do with death and in my twenties when I was faced with losing someone close to me for the first time, I admit I didn’t cope very well. Just thinking about it, scared me half to death.

Considering death is inevitable and is our only one certainty in life, I believe we need to talk about it more; bring it into the conversation. We should all be encouraged to talk about death as part of the bigger picture of the cycle of life, instead of it being something that’s hidden away. Being able to talk about death in this way, won’t make it seem so scary when the time comes.

Today, my beliefs have given me a positive focus on the process. I’m not seeing death as something traumatic or final. I still believe our loved ones stay around us, they’re just not physically with us.

I don’t feel scared to let go of what I have had and have known for all of these years. I want my father to be at peace. In the last few months that is and has always been my priority.


22 Jul, 2012

4 thoughts on “Thoughts on passing

  1. I can relate to this and agree wholeheartedly with your thoughts today. Maybe because you helped me through the loss of my son’s passing and my wife’s cancer as well.

    I’m glad you were able to stand back and self evaluate. You sound very well on this subject and now it’s just the process of coping. My heart is with you.

    Your friend always, Brian.

    1. Thanks Brian. I agree with you, coping with illness or someone’s passing has to be a priority.

      I believe we can get through anything as long as we are able to cope.

  2. I know where you’re coming from. My parents shielded me too, especially if they were ill in any way.

    When my father became ill I was mad and then when he passed away, I was very mad. I’m dealing with it better than I did and it’s been 8 years now. Now my mom’s ill and eventually will pass from this illness but I’m dealing with her illness better than my father’s. It may be because I was closer to my father.

    Sorry about your father. Hope you continue to do well. You’re in my thoughts.

    1. Thanks Lisa. I think you’re right, the less emotionally attached we are to one or even both parents, the easier it is for us to cope.

      These are my experiences too.

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