Why we shouldn’t tease

Growing up with brothers or sisters leaves us open to being teased. Big brothers tend to tease their sisters. I was always being teased. Always had to endure it. You can normally tell when someone is teasing, but how far must a tease go, before it begins to materialise into something more than just a tease?

Why do we tease?

  • To be noticed;
  • To show others that we can be the centre of attention;
  • To get satisfaction from the tease;
  • To know that we can tease;
  • To amuse ourselves;
  • To annoy the person being teased;
  • To hide our vulnerability;
  • A bad habit that we find hard to break;
  • Perhaps a bribe from someone to see if we’ll do the tease.

I believe that even if a tease starts off as something harmless, it can turn into something more. When we tease anyone, we must know that person has a sense of humour and will take the tease in good faith, then I would consider it a tease; but when we target a specific individual with the intention of causing emotional harm, then it can be considered a form of bullying.

When the person we tease begins to feel uncomfortable, or needs to stand his or her ground, then it is obvious it’s more than just a tease. When it happens in the playground at school, it’s more likely to be a form of bullying. I believe there is a difference. I also believe being teased shapes our past, present and future life with memories that we’re not fond to remember.

Perhaps we ought to teach children that it’s not right to tease, if the shoe were on the other foot, they wouldn’t like it; but if it’s something they continue to do, they must accept full responsibility for their actions and any consequences.

Unfortunately, and my experience has shown; not all parents take their children to task on this.


21 Jun, 2011

6 thoughts on “Why we shouldn’t tease

  1. As a reformed teaser I can relate to this.

    Everything you mention is spot on especially the satisfaction obtained from the reaction of the person on the receiving end.

    Ultimately at its least, it is unwarranted behaviour at the other person’s expense and at its worse, it certainly can be a form of bullying.

    Best advice. Don’t start in the first place.

  2. My father teased us constantly as a child. I hated it. My sister-in-law will not tolerate this at all which is good.

    Totally unnecessary behavior.

    1. I’m totally in agreement with you; particularly as you hated it. Your dad teasing you should have got nipped in the bud just as soon as it happened. It’s a shame it was allowed to carry on.

      I have also been teased.

  3. I was teased terribly as a child and teenager by other kids so I know how it feels. I don’t tease unless it’s in good faith.

    1. I know how you must have felt Lisa. I was also teased.

      I am sure there are people out there who tease in good faith; particularly out of fondness, but what you or I consider to be in good faith, may not be considered to be in good faith by the person being teased.

      One of the reasons I’ve never done it.

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