Being pessimistic

Pessimism can spill over into anyone’s lives, at any point. Research also shows there can be a genetic disposition to us being pessimistic. Being pessimistic is something learned.

Early life experiences will often open the floodgates to how we cope with our lives now, where we feel we have no control because of other people and past events. It can make us feel overwhelmed, useless and incompetent, sad and alone, withdrawn and empty inside.

Other people with similar stories may see their lives in a completely different light, by not allowing their past experiences to interfere in their present-day lives. Sadly, whether pessimism is learned, innate or acquired, it stops us from moving forward and can seriously compromise our health.

People who are pessimistic are more likely to struggle and will be more prone to setbacks, than those who are optimistic. Pessimists see situations as bleak and tend to criticise themselves for their setbacks and will see their bad luck as a sign they’ve failed or are simply not worthy of themselves, or their success.

Being pessimistic isn’t something we easily see in ourselves, it’s usually others who will point it out to us and tell us that is what we are.

 


8 Oct, 2010

6 thoughts on “Being pessimistic

  1. I have found my way to the optimistic side of the street. It was quite a journey and a lot of traffic but eventually a crosswalk light came on in my head and I found that life sure was a lot more enjoyable being optimistic.

    My father is an extreme pessimist and it was difficult to live with to say the least, but my mother was borderline and usually would fall into the optimistic category. Therefore I must agree with your outlook on this subject.

    I am just eternally glad that I have the free will to form and live my life in a manner that brings happiness to myself and the ones that I love.

    1. I agree with your sentiments completely Brian. I’m pleased that you have go to a point in your life where you can choose to be happy, because you have seen both sides and know which side you want for yourself and for those you love.

      We have made that journey, independently of one another, and are now crossing the same path with our friendship as we continue our lives. I am enormously proud of the both of us.

  2. My mother was a really positive person, always looking on the bright side, always optimistic. I am like her and not my father who is the opposite.

    He always looks on the dark side. I had a hard time fitting in at school because I was the only disabled kid, so sports was out. I really came into feeling better about myself when I went to college.

    I felt like I was finally doing something worthwhile. I had hope dreams for the future. My advice would be surround yourself with positive, supportive people… it will rub off and you will be so much happier.

    1. I agree with you Randy. It helps us work through our lives with optimism when we surround ourselves with people who are positive and just because we come into contact with people who are pessimistic, doesn’t mean we have to live our lives that way.

      We can choose to live our lives our own way…looking on the bright side.

  3. I just don’t know if I’m one or the other.

    I tend to see problems that arise as challenges that I can overcome. But then again I think about what I’ve been through and feel strange about it. The challenges I face do make me stronger and more of a fighter. I will fight against the bad stuff always.

    Then again I shut down sometimes too. Just don’t want to deal with it attitude. My father was a worrier and I’m like him in so many ways. I worry a lot then I think God will take care of it and I’ll feel better.

    I feel like fighting against my problems makes me feel better and stronger. That’s just how I deal with it. I hope I make sense.

    1. Lisa yes you do make sense.

      From what you say you sound as if you are in both camps. On the one hand, you see your challenges and face them head on, but when it get’s tough you back down as if its all too much for you.

      You are right about you being a worrier. I do see that in you, but at least you know and accept that you are. Now that you do see that, you can work on changing it. I am here to help you, always.

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