There are two types of thought on being unpredictable. The first one is accepted as part of life, the second is too scary to even think about.
We can be unpredictable by going out of our way by doing something kind for someone and because that other someone isn’t expecting it. That is unpredictable and is accepted. When something happens and we don’t foresee it, it’s exciting, welcome and unpredictable.
The other type of unpredictability is abusive and scary at times and can bring with it a sense of foreboding. Let there be no doubt that unpredictable in this manner is abuse. Living with someone whose behaviour is unpredictable is beyond scary, living with someone, never knowing what they’re feeling, or how their behaviour will turn.
We can never know someone who is unpredictable, it’s the nature of what being unpredictable is, but it will always bring with it a sense of unease. We never also know why someone who is unpredictable turns, why they become enraged and on our part, we’re too often willing to make allowances, thinking their behaviour will change that somehow tomorrow will be different.
Having lived a dysfunctional life, I know how the unpredictability thing works. After a while it becomes an acquaintance, one that we wish we didn’t know. Unpredictability becomes the norm, things feel normal again for a short while and then things become scary all over again.
Like the changing seasons, unpredictable behaviour comes and goes, but the focus for us must always remain the same. We must move it away before unpredictability permanently moves in.