Not being in touch with how we feel only serves to create more worry and anxiety. It also means we will end up acting out those anxieties, through cycles of buried anger. It’s how it works.
Not being in touch with how we feel will also cause us to misinterpret what’s going on, as we begin to react to certain situations inappropriately through displaced anger. Therefore, it’s important we think about the thoughts that tie us into feeling what we feel.
A father may come home showing signs of displaced anger through an argument, or a bad day at work. Taking his anger out on his children he begins to defend his behaviour, by saying that his behaviour is simply because his children need discipline. Whilst a parent would agree a child needs discipline, there’s clearly a right and wrong way to hand discipline out.
Dealing with displaced anger is like waiting for a rocket to explode, it’s never easy to know or equate when it will happen, but as we continue to take our anger out on those we love, we will also fail to cultivate empathy and support for our family.
It’s not right for anyone to be at the end of anyone’s displaced anger, let alone a child, just because that person fails to see or deal with their feelings. I believe that not only does displaced anger leave us with permanent emotional scarring until we deal with it, it’s also a form of emotional abuse.