Self-worth & others

Although some of us may have emotional wounds inflicted upon us by others, we owe it to ourselves to make sure we work on healing ourselves.

As a result of that, a lack of self-worth is what we may end up dealing with, which means bouts of self-pity and periods of self-indulgent pity over our circumstances, what’s been done to us, sadly creating the issues we have, none of which retrospectively we could do anything about.

If we could, we would have. But it mustn’t be an excuse for us not to change how we feel about ourselves. When pity starts to become our main focus, then we know it’s time to re-shift our focus and thoughts. There will be times when we go through life and experience self-pity, a change in circumstances usually dictates that.

Of course, there are circumstances where self-pity can be a self-soothing coping mechanism that assists us in accepting and changing our circumstances, but for some if we’re predisposed to existing negative behaviour patterns, self-pity can become a habit, a bad one at that.

Self-pity becoming a habit, can hamper any form of progress and may create self-destructive tendencies that are often hard to break, but introspection helps with that.


11 Nov, 2017

4 thoughts on “Self-worth & others

  1. Our self-esteem is a reflection of how we evaluate our own worth. It is a judgment of ourselves so it is important that we don’t let others impact on that.

    There will be times when we are full of self doubt and that’s okay, as long as we can stand back and identify the reasons such as a change in circumstances like you say.

    What we mustn’t do is let others’ issues hurt our self-esteem as that is for them to own and not us.

    1. Thank you. Yes, our self-esteem or self-worth is how we evaluate ourselves. As you say it is a judgment of ourselves, so we need to make sure we’re kind.

      I think you’re right, it’s easy to let others people’s issues affect us. Their issues will always have a knock on effect on our self-worth and/or self-esteem.

      Sadly, that will not only spiral into other areas of our lives, including relationships with loved ones.

  2. There are waves of self-pity and low worth, then it seems all is fine minutes later. It’s very frustrating.

    I wouldn’t go as far as blaming anyone who’s done me wrong, but those that have in the past, certainly doesn’t help this state of mind. I’ve always had that issue as far back as I can remember.

    1. It would be okay to say you blame, if that was appropriate Bonnie. If we do something because we’re avoiding doing what’s right, then it’s okay to blame.

      Or if something is not done in someone’s best interests, then those responsible must be accountable. Sadly, as I have experienced too self-pity and a lack of self-worth are usually there for a reason.

      If we’re continually let down or deal with something that is not being addressed, there is no doubt that we will have those things to deal with.

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