The art of resisting

11 Jun 2017

We resist the very things that will help us grow and move forward with our lives. We control and box the things we don’t want to deal with in the hope that those things will stay boxed. It’s almost become an art form because we do it so well.

We resist in an attempt to control anything painful, but all that does is reinforce what we know we’ll have to deal with in the longer term. As we start to exhibit signs of anxiety from resisting the very things we need to deal with, we will continue to ignore the signs, because we fail to consciously pay attention to them.

The irony is that more we push and bury issues underground, the more we will be forced to deal with those issues eventually. We resist until we can’t resist anymore, but things generally don’t go away until we deal with them. The more we reinforce positivity, the more we will let go of resisting. We resist because we’re afraid to deal with the inevitable.

We resist because we’re afraid to have a go, we’re afraid to let go. The irony is that although we’re afraid, when we eventually manage to let go, we will see there was absolutely nothing to be afraid of.  The more we resist, the more frequent the things we resist become.

The art of resisting

Resisting anything is part of our subjective (faulty) sense of reality. Most things seem out of our reach until we bring those things back into our reach again. Our experiences, together with our stories from our unconscious, continue to feed our conscious, which tell us we shouldn’t try.

We resist, we shy away from the very things we need to work on. We resent those things, and do battle with them. When we concentrate on not moving beyond the things we resist, we choose not to come to terms with those things. We resist because we’ve already told ourselves that what we’re trying to achieve is totally out of reach.

That’s not so, or even true. Our first instinct is to avoid the more hurtful aspects of our experiences. The sad reality is that by avoiding the very things we resist against, we’re hurting ourselves more because we will always have to face those things.

2 Responses to “The art of resisting”

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  1. Tim 13. Jun, 2017 at 5:29 am #

    Resisting some things is like trying to make a U turn on a narrow street, you have to deal with it anyway. But mostly, I try to resist temptation that looks glossy on the outside.

    I guess I’m one of those guys who likes to play it safe. Besides, it’s easier to be bored by simplicity rather than chaos.

    • Ilana 13. Jun, 2017 at 8:05 am #

      Thanks Tim. Yes, I love to be bored by simplicity. It’s how I like to live my life. Just makes what we deal with easier when we have time to collect our thoughts and work through our issues methodically.

      I agree with your analogy Tim. The things we try to resist will not be hidden for long, we will have to deal with those things. Playing it safe is what keeps us grounded. I would rather go with that than expose ourselves to things we later find we have no control over.

      When we resist, we will a life in denial on what we know we inevitably will have to deal with.

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