Others working with me

It is important others understand and work with me, around my autism. Something I also have to do. My being autistic was made worse because I never understood that’s what it was. I was always expected to conform. It is important that everyone who isn’t autistic understands those who are. Having and dealing with autism is made all the more difficult and confusing for us, because we don’t always understand how we present, we just know how we are and that’s not something we can change.

With autism coping with more than one information stream is difficult. If my mind is focused on something else, and someone is talking to me, I don’t always take in what they’re saying. If I am focused on something …

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11 Sep, 2019

Personal success

As a child, growing up I never thought about success or whether I would become successful. I learned very early on what others’ expectations of me were.

It was expected that I would grow up, marry, and have a family. School was a mere formality, with my struggles, there was no encouragement or guidance, I still struggled to learn and get ahead. I got through …

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9 Sep, 2019

Remorse

“True remorse is never just a regret over consequence; it is a regret over motive.”- Mignon McLauglin.

In other words, remorse is when we do something that is calculated, something that we know isn’t right, when we do something intentionally, knowing it’s going to hurt someone or bring someone down …

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2 Sep, 2019

The things that I hate

I hate that with autism my issues are issues until they become non-issues. I hate that with autism every issue is a problem until it’s dealt with and that’s not as easy as it sounds and others sometimes think we’re paranoid.

I hate having no control over my anxiety through autism and hate even more that I have no control over bad thoughts. I still hate that this isn’t just an autism problem, but brain damage brought about through …

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1 Sep, 2019

Building Trust

Growing up, trust wasn’t something I was a privy to. A unique bond between a parent and child that I could only dream of.

The relationship if handled appropriately and correctly by a parent, will lay the foundations for that child, allowing them to develop their personality and overall behaviour. I wanted and needed to …

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29 Aug, 2019

Denialism

Denialism as it’s called, is an irrational action that withholds the validation of an experience or event, past or present, where a person refuses to accept their verifiable reality by means of observation or experience.

No matter my difficulties I have never denied my realities. I have and continue to tackle my difficulties head on and am truthful about what those are and what I have to deal with. Each blog I write, outlines …

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25 Aug, 2019

Dealing with being different

Growing up with a disability I didn’t know I had, meant I was different. Dealing with being different, wasn’t easy. With skirts on, you could physically see I was different, how I mentally and emotionally presented also made me different.

But through my blog, years on being different has brought about a source of connection and belonging and that’s changed having incorrect assessments made of me, based on my disability and lack …

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22 Aug, 2019

Finding a place

“Verbal abuse (also verbal attack or verbal assault) is the act of forcefully criticising, insulting, or denouncing another person.  Characterized by underlying anger and hostility, it is a destructive form of communication intended to harm the self-concept of the other person and produce negative emotions.” – Wikipedia

Over the years I have lived with abuse, trauma and neglect. I have also lived a dysfunctional life. Whichever way you look at my story, I have been through the mill, but I am lucky that through my blog …

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17 Aug, 2019

Working blindly

It wasn’t just living in the dark, yes there was that, but it’s others thinking it was okay to leave me in the dark that I struggle with the most, that and having to work through a blinder for all these years, until I found out my diagnosis.

So many memories but my biggest memory was finding out I was pregnant for the first time and having no idea about my disability, or how things would work out around my pregnancy and disability …

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16 Aug, 2019
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