A closed mind

We close our minds. We close our minds to the possibilities that we may have done okay, but instead convince ourselves we’ve failed.

We then continue to convince ourselves that we’ve failed, instead of waiting to see what the results are with an open mind. Then not only have we convinced ourselves we’ve failed, we also manage to convince others that we’ve failed.

Whatever happened to the let’s just wait and see scenario?

In the case of an exam, if we’re meant to pass we’ll pass, whether we think we’ve failed the exam or not and even when someone tries to tell us they think we’ve done okay, we’re still intent on telling ourselves we’ve failed.

I believe it’s important to work with an open mind, because nine times of out ten when we’ve talked ourselves into something, the opposite often happens. Unfortunately, when we think we’ve failed at something before we actually know we’ve failed, we’ve already set ourselves up for a fall, not to mention the amount of stress we put ourselves through, just to work through the process.

Of course, there will be times where we will have failed and that’s okay too, but we must always have an open mind about the possibilities. A closed mind will also affect how we see other outcomes in other areas of our lives.

Having seen this pattern play out so many times before, it’s a pattern that will continue to be used by us, until we learn to change it and that can have a negative effect on our emotional health.

1 Jun, 2014

6 thoughts on “A closed mind

  1. I try to keep an open mind about things and a positive attitude.

    When I was in nursing school the teachers didn’t think I was assertive enough to pass the state test to get my licence, but I kept an open mind about it. I not only passed the exam but I scored higher than a lot of the others, including the top person in the class and she failed three times. I wanted to go back and just rub it in their face but I’m not that type of person.

    Being positive with an open mind is a good thing and it feels better to be that way. I also think that if we think we have failed and do, there is more disappointment.

    1. Thanks Lisa. I also grew up in the same era, where it was literally sink or swim. We’re not born knowing how to be good at something. We should be taught these skills either through our parents and/or school and in school none of this was encouraged unfortunately.

      As a child nothing was ever discussed with me. When it came to exams I waited on the outcome. I didn’t think about them.

      I agree with you that having an open mind is always a good thing.

  2. I’m glad you said failure was okay too. I happen to believe failure is an option and necessary to maintain balance and good emotional health, but failure almost always leads to success sooner or later. We typically fail before we succeed anyway; they seem to go hand in hand.

    So my mind is open to success, but it’s also open to the possibility of failure and I face both with optimism.

    1. Yes failure is okay too and I agree with you. Having both gives us stability, a more balanced view or take on our lives.

      I believe we have to fail to know what it’s like to succeed, but also to be gracious about it. We have to taste both in our life. It’s life’s balance.

  3. I think being open minded is one of the most important aspect of our personalities and a major influence on the success of our relationships. Close mindedness is a source of so many unnecessary problems.

    As for failure, I certainly agree with you that this is just as important to our development and understanding as success. Unfortunately much of society sees failure as a weakness, only rewarding success.

    1. I agree with you. Being open minded is a very important of our personalities and will always have an influence on how successful our relationships will be.

      Perhaps the problem with failure is our inability to be okay with failing. We hate to fail. We see it as a slur on our personalities, that others will think we’re inadequate or incapable.

      There is much we can learn from failing. How we deal with failure is our most important lesson. Failing helps us to build the foundations, so that we can learn how be successful in our lives.

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