I needed to drop something off into school for one of my children and as I was walking into reception, I could see my reflection in the glass door and I could see myself limping.
On the whole I do well at ignoring the fact that I have a limp, then suddenly from nowhere I felt irritated. For that split second, time stood still and I was that child in the school playground.
I came away feeling despondent that I allowed myself to be weak. I was back there in school with thoughts of children staring, because they knew I walked with a limp and because walking with a limp made me different.
It’s unnerving that a situation can remind us of something we’ve dealt with and for that split second we’re back in that same place, with the same feelings, the same thoughts and the same struggles, as if we were that child again.
I often wonder at myself how I have managed to come through my childhood relatively unscathed. I don’t always feel comfortable walking in and out of public places so walking into school that day was hard for me.
Luckily students walking to and from the playground were preoccupied with each other and weren’t particularly paying attention to me.