A question of respect

This was on my mind today. Something I come back to because I was told by someone close to me many years ago that he demanded respect and I told him that respect was supposed to be earned that it wasn’t something we’re entitled to have just because we demand it.

That just because someone is older than we are, doesn’t mean they automatically deserve to have our respect. Doesn’t respect depend on the relationship and what the other person brings to the relationship? Doesn’t it also depend on the circumstances and whether that person deserves to have our respect?

Respect should be a two-way street, but it’s sometimes a privilege that is abused and something that someone takes for granted thinking they’ll always have and others are still expected to fall into line and hand out their respect.


18 Mar, 2018

4 thoughts on “A question of respect

  1. Yes, there are a lot of people who end up in a position of power and they expect everyone to worship the ground they walk on and ‘kiss their ring’ to put it politely.

    This was why I didn’t do very well in the Army, since you’re supposed to blindly follow orders, which I figured out quickly was something that I despised.

    I grew up with parents who expected me to do the same, while they treated me so very poorly and I didn’t deserve to be treated the way they wanted to be.

    This is one of the biggest issues out in the world where people demand respect, when they haven’t done anything to deserve it and turn into demons who punish their people for not doing so.

    I’m sure that is why I don’t enjoy dealing with a lot of people, seeing as I don’t react well to being treated poorly; but I wasn’t allowed as a kid to say anything about it.

    It has taken me a very long time to learn how to respect myself, enough to feel like it’s okay to do so.

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, as children we’re taught to respect everyone, but there are those who don’t deserve to have our respect; particularly around abuse.

      Those people tend not to respect themselves for a reason we’re not always aware of. But the more respectful of ourselves we are, the more we understand where our respect of others lie.

      My own thinking is that where people show bad behaviour and still expect others to respect them, that’s where we should be able to choose for ourselves.

  2. Respect is earned or not after we truly see who someone is, by way of their actions and general behavior. That image may linger or may never go away.

    The universe gives us clues and a little bit of light to see through the mess sometimes.

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, respect must always be earned. We are free to make our choice on whether we choose to respect someone.

      It is only through seeing their behaviour that we are able to make our choice. In the case of abuse we’re sadly not always aware we are being subjected to abuse, because abuse isn’t always obvious to us.

      Through an unkind word, sarcasm, and a warped sense of humour are all abuse. It is only when we are able to piece all of our experiences together, that we see what is abuse.

      I believe our intuition is what gives us the clues, usually when we see the light, the universe will help pave the way through a change in circumstances.

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