As a child, I wanted to walk heel toe like everyone else. I was constantly checking my heels to see the difference between both heels and how they were wearing down and would get annoyed with myself because one was normal and the other wasn’t.
When I crayoned out of the lines, I’d throw the colouring sheet I was using in the bin and start again. It’s no excuse but I suppose emotionally I was struggling. I just didn’t understand why. The outlines on my handwriting were too small. If I made a mistake I would start again.
Being a perfectionist seemed to be centred around my Cerebral Palsy. Or perhaps it wasn’t so much about perfection for me. I just wanted things to be right. But for those who are chasing perfection it can be exhausting. It’s an endless uphill struggle when we try to be the best at everything.
It’s an impossible quest, one that will end with disappointment, because no one can expect to continue to be the best all the time. The bar on perfection will always be raised. The boundaries will always be moved. It’s not something that will be in our grasp. Being a perfectionist can also be a stressful burden. Having to keep up standards is stressful enough.
Being the best at everything means we’ll never really enjoy success. Sometimes it’s not always obvious to us that we are perfectionists, but it’s more obvious to others.