Peering out of the window and seeing a neighbour going out with her daughter, for a split second my thoughts went back to my own childhood with my parents, and I found myself wondering whether my neighbour would accomplish great things with her child.
I understand why my thoughts went back there. We may sometimes stop to question whether our parents have got things right for us, and then use those comparisons to quantify where we are in life, how happy we are, or how satisfied we are with our lot. Or maybe it has something to do with our less than perfect childhood.
We innately take our behaviour from our parents, but it’s usually only when we stop to question what we know that we can begin to change what we didn’t like, or what didn’t work for us. It’s only when we hear ourselves repeating our mother’s words and we say, ‘I’m turning into my mother’ that we realise that is what we are doing.
Sometimes it’s not a bad thing, but it’s not always a good thing either. It just means we must work harder through our parenting, at finding a place with our own children so that they may write a positive history for themselves.
It’s very hard to get everything right as a parent and it’s something we may not accomplish, but if our children can see that we have done our best and that our best is good enough, then we will have achieved greatly.
I believe it’s important for us to make a positive impact on our children. What we leave behind will stay with them, long after we’re gone. It will also give them a positive view on their own lives as they go out into the world.
It is important for us to try and get it right because it’s right to get it right and so that when we’re no longer around, their memories of us are positive ones.