Peering out of the window and seeing a neighbour going out with her daughter, for a split second my thoughts went back to my own childhood with my parents, and I found myself wondering whether my neighbour would accomplish great things with her child.
I understand why my thoughts went back there. We might sometimes stop to question whether our parents have got things right with us, and then use those comparisons to quantify where we are in life, how happy we are, and how satisfied we are; or maybe it has something to do with our less than perfect childhood.
We innately take our behaviour from our parents, but it’s usually only when we stop to question what we know that we can begin to change what didn’t work for us. I’ve heard it said, it’s only when we hear ourselves repeating our mother’s words and we say, ‘I’m turning into my mother’ that we realise that’s what we are doing.
It’s not always bad, but it means we need to work harder through our parenting, at finding a place with our own children so that they write a positive history for themselves.
It’s very hard to get everything right as a parent and it’s something we may not accomplish, but if our children can see that we have done our best and that our best is good enough, then we will have achieved greatly.
I believe it’s important to make a positive impact on our children. What we leave behind will stay with them long after we’re gone. It will also give them a positive view on their own lives, as they go out into the world.
It’s important for us to try and get it right because it’s the right thing to do and so that when we’re no longer around, their memories of us are positive ones.