Conspicuous by absence

Although I went to my father’s funeral, I’m not unhappy about it because I know he’s finally at peace. From my own experience of funerals though, they can often bring out the worst in us.

I’ve been to many funerals and what is always noticeable is those people who fail to show up. Some will show up as a mark of respect, others will use the day as a chance to wipe the slate clean.

As in life we have our differences of course, but I’m not sure that showing our differences at that particular moment is appropriate. Don’t you find that this often happen at funerals?


9 Mar, 2013

6 thoughts on “Conspicuous by absence

  1. I think it’s a little childish actually, like ‘so there!’ I get the final say by not coming to your funeral.

    Down the road the person will more than likely regret their bad choice. Not only is it disrespectful to the person that passed but also to their family.

    People like this are selfish and only care about themselves. Now if there is a good reason for not going, like an illness or they are just not able to go, that’s understandable.

    A card of condolence should be sent though.

  2. I remember when my grandmother was alive after my grandfather passed away. Friends of theirs I was always running into. I said to them more than once Grandma would love for you to visit her.

    They did at the funeral home after she was gone. I was so angry about that. What was the point she was dead. She did not know they were there.

    1. Unfortunately Randy what you describe is life for many of us. People say they will do thing but never do. If there are reasons we never get to hear about them.

      I believe your grandma will have known they showed at the funeral home. Just a little late for the rest of the family.

  3. I find it strange that some people will not go to a funeral and then they feel guilty for not going. I like it when there is a celebration of life afterwards, it’s as if you are celebrating their presence in your life.

    It’s nice to remember the happy times in a person’s life, I’m sure the person that passed would like it somehow.

    1. I think it’s lovely when we remember the happy times in a person’s life, but not sure that always happens! I am like you Maria, I believe in celebrating a person’s life, not mourning their death.

      A celebration after the funeral works for me.

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