Finding closure again

I’m pleased I was given an opportunity to see another neurologist to try to find out a little more about my symptoms, and although the consultation wasn’t altogether successful, I came away with some positive thoughts.

I went in with no preconceived ideas, hoping that my neurologist could shed some light on more of my symptoms. I wanted to be given another chance to work through some of my symptoms so that I could finally link my daily experiences with my presenting symptoms.

Unfortunately, he already had notes from my doctor in front of him from previous correspondence. Although that made it slightly more difficult, I came out knowing more than when I walked in. I gained a clearer understanding of which part of my brain is damaged and which parts of my body this accords with.

My neurologist went on to explain why my leg is worse than my arm and explained in more detail which part of the brain was responsible for that. This should bring me partial closure, because that’s as far as I can go.

It is not possible to be certain which of my daily symptoms are attributable to my cerebral palsy, and which to my having been born prematurely. But the neurologist thought that cognitive behavioural therapy would help with brain fatigue.

The consultant had difficulty understanding that even though I don’t have all the answers I can still bring closure. Everything feels lighter now, because for the moment I know I’ve gone as far as I can.

23 Sep, 2011

4 thoughts on “Finding closure again

  1. Even if the appointment didn’t go too well, I’m glad you got a few answers and you can bring about closure.

    I think there will always be questions and if new symptoms arise will it be related to CP or something else. Only time will tell.

    You do deserve some peace and it seems like you may have some now. I’m happy for you.

    1. Thanks Lisa. I have one or two more answers on my brain function and how that works around my physical symptoms, but that’s it.

      You are completely right in what you say, there would always be questions with new symptoms that may arise as I age, but for now I’m happy to let it go. I can go no further. I’ve done all I can.

      That’s probably why I am okay with bringing closure.

  2. As unsatisfactory as the consultation went, I do believe that you can use this to help bring closure and that will be a big help.

    You deserved better, but I really don’t think there is the help out there.

    1. I totally agree with you.

      This is such a harsh reality for me. Forty eight years on, I am still not that much better off; but you are right I can use this experience to bring about closure and will.

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