Getting on with life

I have always got on with life and have never complained about anything. There would have been no point, no one was listening.

There are those people whose cup is always half empty; always have something to complain about, something to moan about and something to be negative about. However, there are those who it doesn’t matter what they’re dealing with emotionally, will always cope with what life throws at them; they’re just okay with everything.

I’ve spent a weekend in St Andrews in Scotland with one such lady; my mother-in-law. Who has everything to complain about but never does. Whatever life throws at her she’s always cheerful. She’s a good listener; has lots of patience and doesn’t judge or wallow in self-pity over her fate, even though she has much reason too. She also doesn’t take her frustrations out on other people.

In the time I’ve known her she’s never made anyone else a scapegoat, or sees other people in a bad light. She always has something nice to say and never stands in judgment. Being in anyone’s company who behaves in this way will automatically help us feel better about ourselves.

That’s what she does and although she doesn’t set out to show others how to live their lives, when you spend time with her you cannot help but see there is always a better way you can do things. A remarkable lady and an inspiration.

11 Sep, 2013

12 thoughts on “Getting on with life

  1. I understand the serenity of being in the moment and have been praying and working towards her peace.

    It’s almost like her soul is pure, she has accepted life for the good to be found. Thank you for sharing this.

    1. You’re welcome. Thank you so much for this Brian. I completely agree with your thoughts here.

      I’m so pleased you’re working on your own peace and hope you’re close to where you want to be.

  2. A very inspirational person. We should all strive to be that way.

    I am guilty of complaining, mainly to my husband. If I’m in pain or had a bad day I tell him. I know he gets tired of hearing it but I don’t really have anyone else to talk to about things he’s supposed to be my best friend.

    My daughter complains about everything and if there is nothing wrong she will find something to ‘whine’ about. I listen to her and give her my best advice, which lately has been, ‘you need to make your own decision about that because I can’t do it for you.’

    I’m trying to do better about voicing my complaints and just keeping things to myself.

    1. Thanks Lisa. I think we should too. I think being equipped with the right tools definitely helps us work through our issues without the complaints, but unfortunately the other part is genetic and environmental.

      We must all make a conscious effort to change so that we become more positive and learn to cope with our lives better than perhaps our parents did or even our grandparents. We tend to blame how we turn out on our families and whilst there may be some truth in that when we’re little, as adults we’re solely responsible for ourselves, regardless of who got what wrong with us.

      I take after my mother who was a very positive person on the outside, who lived with insecurities that didn’t seem to affect her outwardly, whilst my father was the complete opposite.

      I believe anyone can achieve peace. We have to give ourselves the tools, however we choose to do that and just learn to let go of things.

  3. Yes this does seem to be a very hard thing to do at times! I’ve always been one to exist but not really live, which leads to a very empty feeling life.

    I’m always impressed by the people who have the biggest problems who end up complaining the least. I have ended up wasting so much time in my life, which I can never get back by wallowing in the misery of how horrible my life was!

    The truth was that I was so paralyzed by a lot of my fears that I didn’t dare to do things that I wanted to do for my own life. Now I’m having to learn how to actually get on with my life which makes it so much easier!

    1. It’s always lovely to how well someone else is doing, but that can sometimes reinforce where we are in our own lives, not always in a good way, but honestly believe that it’s something we can eventually aspire to ourselves.

      When we constantly live with fear it’s difficult to get on with anything let alone our lives and it starts in childhood. As children, our parents insecurities become ours, their fears become ours, everything they struggle with becomes our struggle too.

      Although we are conditioned, we must change our conditioning to think and feel differently about our own lives. We must learn to let go.

  4. I confess I do complain.

    It’s good to get our frustration out, but what is bad is when when we just wallow in our self-pity for an extended period. Get your frustration out and move on.

    1. Thanks Maria. Thank you for your honesty. I agree that if we have frustrations we must get them out, but as you say it’s also important for us to move on too.

      If we’re constantly taking out our frustrations on others all of the time, they wouldn’t want to be around us for long, therefore it’s important to manage our frustrations as much as we can.

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Ilana x