Grievances are something we hold on to, don’t do anything about them until we get to boiling point, then we let rip! It’s something I’ve experienced twice in my life, but not something I’ve handed out. I tend to sort out my problems before it gets to that stage where I hold a grievance.
It’s often someone else’s take on what we say, which leads to a grievance, not necessarily what we say. Unfortunately, not all grievances will be resolved. That very much depends on the person who has the grievance. Sometimes we’re not even aware they’re holding a grievance until they let rip.
When the grievance comes like a bolt out of the blue and is complete news to us, it’s probably less likely to be resolved. From my own experience once someone gets to that stage where they harbour a grievance, they’ve already made up their mind as to which way they want to go and there’s generally nothing we can do about it.
In any event, it would be a pointless exercise trying to resolve a grievance, unless the person with the grievance wants to resolve it. Preconceived ideas are such, whichever way you look at them. Conclusions have already been made. When we get to the point where we’re able to sort out our differences, we’re less likely to hold on to a grievance.
Finally, if someone says something you’re not happy with, always try to go back in and talk about the issue. Life’s too short to hold a grievance and fall out for good.