Helping change attitudes

20 Apr 2017

The CP Diary will be 7 on the 17th May 2017, into its 8th year. I hope that in 7 years, my blogs and my experiences are helping to change attitudes, attitudes on how we choose to deal with ourselves, attitudes towards our lives and attitudes towards each other.

I hope that through my blog, I have shown that attitudes can change that we can all help change attitudes. That we can come full circle. That just because we start off in one place, doesn’t mean we have to stay in that place. That with the right support and the right people around us, we can change our attitudes to our life and towards other people.

The CP Diary is my story, my life and my experiences. I hope my blog in its entirety is helping to changes attitudes and thoughts on what we deal with. I also hope that my blog helps break down the barriers that could cause conflict between people. That attitudes around disability will also continue to change.

And for those who may struggle more that others choose to assist and lead them by the hand, until they can do it for themselves. As I continue to write more blogs into my 8th year that I will continue to find ways to embrace yet more change, whilst helping to encourage more changing attitudes.

2 Responses to “Helping change attitudes”

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  1. Randy 20. Apr, 2017 at 1:25 pm #

    Yes, The CP Diary has helped me out tremendously, as far as dealing with myself and the world around me. We connected early on through the Daily Strength website and found out we had a lot in common. I know for me I don’t often connect that well with many other people so I was pleasantly surprised.

    We have both had to battle our own issues without a whole lot of knowledge as to what they were, but knowing that we had them. It is a daily struggle for me to change the attitudes I grew up with that were drilled into my head as far as feeling like, I’m not worthy! I have to fight to remind myself that it is okay to focus on my needs, wants and desires and that they do matter.

    It finally dawned on me recently that a lot of the work I need to do is to be deprogrammed like a cult member who has managed to escape. They get indoctrinated and brainwashed into believing in whatever the cult leader believes and lose all sense of their own identity, like I did as a child.

    I watched the series about Scientology and the more I watched, the more I realised I had been treated a lot of the same ways by my own mother. My own parents forced their attitudes on me and just to keep the peace,I would usually just go along with whatever they happened to be spouting off about.

    It isn’t as easy as people seem to think to defeat a lifetime of thinking certain way,s when they have been drilled into your mind pretty much every day. Boy, don’t I wish it was? People seem to have the delusion that it is when they haven’t had to endure someone breaking their spirit and very nearly crushing their soul.

    These are probably the same type of people who would think that you could just get over it, as far as dealing with Cerebral Palsy. I also realised that I was actually doing that to my daughter without stopping to think that she hasn’t been shown how to adapt and overcome a lot of her issues which is very sad.

    I have been so wrapped up in my own little world that I didn’t quite realise that I don’t have to live the way I have been as far as just putting up with whatever comes along, like a relationship that isn’t very healthy for me. I don’t deal well with a lot of change, but this is one that I definitely need to look at seeing, as I have someone else depending on me who should be a lot more important.

    People so often continue to choose to live the way they always have for just this reason. Like she said in, ‘Game of Thrones,’ people do actually learn to love their chains without even really realising that they don’t have to wear them, even when they are offered freedom.

    I have watched so many people make that choice, as in going back to drinking or an unhealthy relationship even though they should know better. Attitudes seem to be one of the hardest things to defeat for people, even when you show them that making certain changes would improve their quality of life.

    What I have learned (and had to accept whether I like it or not) is that people will only change if and when they want to. You can’t help those who aren’t willing to help themselves.

    Yes, I am trying to wrap this up seeing as I know it has become an essay, but I think it is so very important with what we have talked about over the years. We are both trying to defeat certain attitudes that people have as in you with Cerebral Palsy and me with mental health issues.

    People tend to look at both of them like we choose to be this way, when neither one of us would have ever volunteered to have this issues. Issues like birth defects and genetics come into play, which are things that we had no control over and nothing that we should be ashamed of.

    We are all human beings and shouldn’t be judged so harshly seeing as we may be different than others. Maybe if people worked more on changing that attitude, for a start and focused more on how much we’re alike, the human race would have a better chance of surviving!

    • Ilana 20. Apr, 2017 at 1:48 pm #

      I think you’re right Randy, we are all human beings and therefore shouldn’t be judged so harshly, or at all. If we were to focus on how much alike we could be I think we’d all communicate and get on better.

      There comes a time in all of our lives when it’s time to say enough is enough. Yes, we’ve been through the mill and back, we have a lot that we’ve had to deal with, but as you say it’s learning a different pattern and a different way to think.

      It took me too many years to learn what was actually wrong with me and although mental health can be slightly different, I think a lot of what you had to deal with, isn’t coming from you. It’s coming from your parents parenting of you and some of that can be changed.

      We become aware from an early age how things are, where we are with family, but it takes a lot longer than that to be able to change how we are and what we need to change. The more we change our attitude to our own issues, the more I believe others will change their attitude towards us.

      I believe that to be true. I wouldn’t change a thing in my own life now. It took me a while to work it all through, observing my life brought me to a better place. The CP Diary is a culmination of my experiences, and now hopefully changing attitudes, so others will see they too can change.

      I believe you’re strong enough to change your own attitudes Randy for you to change some of what you need to change. They’re small steps, but significant ones.

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