Holding on to things

We hold on to the things we know we desperately want to happen, even though we know deep down those things will never happen. As a child, I used to do the same thing.

An an adult in therapy, I would ask the same questions, but that was met with the same answers, there were no answers concrete enough, to change my thinking. The answers are now in my blog. We hold on in the hope that what we want to happen will one day happen, but the reality is that it may never happen.

We hold on to a dream that our lives will be different. We hold on to the things that don’t want to be held, instead of using the time, space and energy for the things that want us. I held on to the premise that my life would play out differently that I would have support. That I would begin to feel different.

I spent my life in denial, questioning the very things that would give me the answers I was looking for, instead of coming to accept the fact that the things I wanted to happen, would never happen. We’re so intent on seeing things the way we think or want them to be, we fail to look or come to terms with the way things are.

The truth is our lives would be simpler if we began to see our circumstances in the way they are, instead of the way we want those things to be and stop seeing those things through rose coloured spectacles, continually wishing our lives were different. We can live in hope that things will change for the better, but I see little point in spending an entire life waiting for the different to happen.

And that if we simply chose to base our understandings on the information being presented to us, we would learn sooner why things are the way they are and stop holding on to the things that we unconsciously know will never happen, unless those others want them to happen.

19 Mar, 2017

4 thoughts on “Holding on to things

    1. Thanks Tim. Hope is gradual, it gives us a platform from which to work from. It also gives us an open door, a way forward.

      I believe everything else will work out through hope and that even if it doesn’t work out straight away and we have one or two bumps in the road, we will eventually get there because we have hope. Hope gives us strength.

      It is the hope that keeps us motivated. Without hope we have nothing and with nothing we can never have hope.

  1. I have never held on to things as I grew up independent of my family; so as an adult I accept what is and what isn’t.

    As you say there is no point wishing things are different; our time is better spent on things that matter.

    1. You’re absolutely right. Wishing things were different just serves to make us bitter. It’s important we all completely accept and come to terms with the things we cannot change. Where we think we have our moods and behaviour tell a different story.

      Unfortunately, we can never hide from what goes on in our subconscious and that tells a different story to what we tell our family, or the world.

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