Legacies matter

When I was growing up, it mattered what people thought of me, but I didn’t think about how that would tie in with my legacy at the time or what legacy I would personally leave behind.

But as we go about our daily lives, do we think about our legacy and the impact our legacy will have on others, once we’re no longer here. I’m not really sure we think that way, but very often I believe the issues we deal with become our legacy, because of our change in behaviour; the way we are with people.

I have witnessed what happens when someone leaves a legacy behind that I wouldn’t want to have myself. Unfortunately, even with the good things we do in our lives, one bad decision can change everything, it doesn’t matter what’s gone before. People tend to have very long memories.

Even if we go on to make good in our lives after a past we’re not proud of, the past still tends to follow us; people won’t let that go.  That doesn’t make it right it just makes it what it is, but everyone deserves a second chance; regardless of what’s past.

I believe legacies matter. Even if we haven’t done much in our lives, it’s always nice for people to think good thoughts about us when we’re no longer here.


4 Jul, 2015

8 thoughts on “Legacies matter

  1. I want my legacy to be of someone who is nurturing to others. Family is first in line, friends are in second, stangers in third. The thing is that I am kind and would help anybody if they were hurt or somethinG like that.

    There is a saying that states, that too good no good. If there is a fault, it would be that I drop everything to take care of others to the detriment of myself. There needs to be a balance, not everyone will do the same in kind.

    Nobody’s keeping tabs as to how kind we are, but people will remember the good things we do whilst we are here.

    1. Thanks Maria. From you wording it sounds as though what you want your legacy to be is exactly as you choose to do things now and that’s good.

      I think you’re right, people don’t necessarily keep tabs as to how kind we are, but they would soon come to notice if we behaved in an unkind or inappropriate way. I agree with you there needs to be a balance.

      We must look after ourselves as well as take care of others. We shouldn’t neglect ourselves.

  2. People do have very long memories which means that I still worry about what they would think if they knew who my parents were in this area.

    My father offended a lot of people by taking advantage of their generosity. My sister reminded me of that when she talked about how he used to parade us in front of people so they would feel sorry for us and he could get money from them. My mother was one who wanted everybody to feel sorry for her so that she could get all the attention!

    I’ve had to learn about things like alcoholism and Munchausen’s syndrome, which both of them were affected with. It doesn’t make the past any different but it does help me to have a better understanding of what happened.

    My biggest fear is ending up old and alone in a nursing home with no one really caring whether I’m dead or alive. My fears have kept me from doing a lot of the things I have wanted to do in my life because of the legacy I have carried with me for so long.

    My parents dumped so much of their own baggage on to us which has affected us in the worst ways. The guilt, shame and remorse follows me around like a black cloud over my head. The truth is that I’m not a stupid person, but I have just made a lot of stupid decisions in my life based on just surviving and not really living.

    I don’t want to continue living like a shadow of myself in what time I do have left!

    1. Thanks Randy. Your parents legacy is what they chose to leave behind and although your stories are extricably linked, (in that you were their child) you have the power to change your own legacy in the present moment.

      I could have kept things the same, but I have consciously chosen not to copy my parents’ legacy. I used to worry about what other people thought, but not any more. The people who choose to remember will always remember. Those who forgive and come to understand will not stand in judgment of you.

      It’s up to all of us to change how we want others to see us in our lives so that when it’s out turn to pass, we leave the best legacy behind; one that we’d be proud of.

      As they say we are not our brother’s keeper, neither are we our family’s keeper, including our parents and I believe that to be true.

  3. I only hope that when I am gone, I leave a good legacy for my kids. That they will remember me without too much resentment and realized I did my best to be a good mom.

  4. I think our legacies are ultimately the only thing that really matters. The underlying problem is that most people have a degree of indifference toward life and a fearless attitude about existence after death.

    My legacy is my resume’for things hoped for and things unseen.

    1. Thanks Tim, I couldn’t agree more.

      I think if more people were bothered about how other people see them and what impressions they leave behind, they would certainly make more of an effort to change things whilst they were here.

      We can easily change. The sad reality is that not too many of us are bothered, but feel it is important that our loved ones remember us fondly when we’re no longer here. Unfortunately I’ve seen first hand what happens when we don’t.

      The cycle continues when we don’t, but have full control to change the way we do things this side of life so that the legacies we leave behind are exactly the way we want them to be.

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