As a child, we live in fear of the reality that one day our parents will no longer be around us anymore. Then we don’t have the knowledge and the beliefs that we do today. Whenever it happens, it can be scary, particularly how they might go. I’m taking a few moments today to reflect and although I’m not happy, I am doing okay.
My mother passed away what will be 5 years on the 25th May this year. I have always believed that she will go to spirit, but will still be around me as I live my life and make my choices and believe that my father is now getting ready to do the same. The last five years have been the most difficult years.
My father’s health has finally taken its toll and he will soon start his own spiritual journey. I cannot believe that we’re at this place where decisions need to be made for him to live out his last weeks’ peacefully. It doesn’t seem real.
I am not afraid to lose him. I know he will be around me as I go about my life; what is quite scary is watching him fade away. I have never been good around illness. I’ve always shied away from it since I was a little girl.
I know that because I have Cerebral Palsy I have Sensory Processing Disorder issues. Seeing my father ill, will reinforce all my sensory issues. I’ll just have to muddle though, the best I can.