Lowering expectations

It’s easy to be disappointed when what we expect from others isn’t what we get back. Years ago, if you did something for someone, you were more or less guaranteed a thank you, of a good deed done.

So how do we go about avoiding disappointment? I believe the answer is in our expectations. If we learned to lower our expectations of others, we wouldn’t feel so disappointed in other people’s behaviour and attitude. That doesn’t mean we should change the way we do things, because we should always continue to do what we think and feel is right.

But it does mean that if we lower our expectations of what we expect others to do, we won’t end up harbouring so much resentment through unfulfilled expectations and disappointments.


8 Jan, 2015

6 thoughts on “Lowering expectations

  1. I’ve learned just that. Not to expect anything from anybody. That way if I do get something back I am genuinely surprised.

    1. It took me many years to understand the correlation, but I have come to believe it’s absolutely the best way. Thanks Lisa.

  2. I think we’re all guilty of expecting too much and being disappointed. I’ve certainly learned to lower my expectations of people, but it shouldn’t have to be like that.

    1. I agree with you; it shouldn’t have to be like that, but until people change the way they behave, particularly in certain circumstances, we have no choice.

      I certainly wouldn’t choose to lower my expectations if there was another way. We all need to do what’s right by each other, so that we’re not put in that situation.

  3. Yes that’s been most of my life, where I was always expecting more from people and being so disappointed in the end!

    My parents always made a lot of promises they couldn’t keep, so it’s no wonder we were always so confused. It usually felt like they were lying straight to our faces, so after a while I stopped believing in anything they said!

    I compare it to being brainwashed by the CIA and my parents were excellent at messing with our heads. I would have rather been physically abused considering wounds actually heal. It just made me blind to people who I shouldn’t have trusted and I was actually surprised that they took advantage of me!

    Right at this point, I don’t think I could have my expectations of people any lower, which is actually a good thing for me!

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes it’s very hard when parents promise their kids things and don’t come up trumps. It must have been hard for you Randy.

      Generally speaking I have learned through my own experiences that when we don’t come to expect, we’re not disappointed.

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