We spend our lives making allowances for people. As parents, we make allowances. We compensate or allow for things depending on what others have to deal with.
As a child growing up with difficulties, there were times where allowances were made for me, because of my physical problems. I don’t remember what they were exactly, although I remember feeling at the time they were probably being made out of pity, because of what I was having to deal with.
I didn’t mind because in some small way, because it made up for what I was dealing with; although looking back now it clearly wasn’t fair on my siblings. Another problem with it, is that we’re already being singled us out as being different when all we want to do is fit in, although in that moment it does take the pressure off.
For some our confidence and self-esteem may be hit by the allowances that are made, I know that because as I child I was already dealing with confidence issues. Making allowances seemed to add to my confidence issues. Making any form of allowance will always put a slant on our relationships too as other people will be affected by how we interact with them, through those allowances.
Away from any allowance, I believe that in order to cope better in our lives we have to learn to stand on our own two feet. It’s the only way we learn how to cope with what we have to deal with. As the adult this is exactly what I have chosen to done.
On a finishing note, when allowances are always being made for us we don’t learn, we just accept when something is being permitted and that’s not the same thing.