Just under 9 years ago, when I found out about cerebral palsy I wanted to do something for the first time that was positive and so that I could get to grips and understand everything I needed to know about my disability. Now recently diagnosed with Autism, I must do the same, so I can understand and come to terms with my neurological symptoms that form part of my cerebral palsy diagnosis.
Finding out about cerebral palsy in my forties and Autism in my 50’s isn’t how I wanted my life to play out, that side has been enormously difficult; but I now know why my life had to happen like that. I have always known there was more to me than what you could physically see. It was important I knew everything about me.
My being able to see everything in black and white is a gift. It allows me to see issues and situations as they are, rather than how I would like them to be. Because of my damaged brain and heightened senses, I see things from a totally different perspective and although that’s hard in terms of communication and social acceptance, I don’t feel the need to fit in, primarily because I have become more accepting of myself.
My writing and blogging is a gift. I am able to do what I do because I have Autism. Although I find it difficult to express my thoughts verbally, I am free and have no problems expressing my thoughts on paper.
Uniquely, even as a child it was a gift that was with me. I didn’t know it then, but it is a part of me now and I love it.