I find it comforting that my weird but beautiful mind is the reason I am able to articulate my thoughts in the way that I do.
When Chris Packham, A BBC Natural History Presenter, talked about his traits in his television documentary, commenting that he wouldn’t be as successful as he is without Asperger’s. He was in no doubt that Asperger’s has made him the success he is today.
I too experience my world in a very different way to what is considered normal, with heightened senses that can sometimes be overwhelming, with a mind that constantly bounces from one subject to another, without clarity that creates uncertainty, anxiety and stress.
Through my blog, I challenge the idea that I need to change in order to fit into society. I shouldn’t have to change because I deal with a disability, it’s others who must find a way to fit into my normal.
Through my writing, I contemplate and reflect on all of my experiences, bringing those experiences into the limelight for me to find understanding and for others to read and challenge an understanding for themselves on their own experiences.
Although being brutally honest and open about my struggles helps me understand, it doesn’t change the outcome. I still am where I am, but it does allow me to bring closure on those times, through new understanding and new eyes. No matter the disability, we shouldn’t be penalised for being different.
I remember a Mothers’ day card that said and I quote ‘sometimes the family liked to gather outside and try to work out which planet Mum was from’ and I smiled. Within seconds, I understood the meaning behind the words.
Because I am weirdly different, my thinking and what I do is like no other. But that’s okay. I am who I am and what I deal with has helped me make who I am today. I am happy and comfortable in my own skin.
I couldn’t think or express myself in the way that I do, or write in the way I do without my neurological impairments. I am blessed because I am different.