Writing a book has been a cathartic experiences and the best thing I have ever done. Writing it has been easy because the words were just there, but it has brought in a different thinking from me.
What you write can either bring relief, or it can leave you clutching at your experiences with anger that your life turned out the way it did. The book has brought closure, but also regret that those who should have made a difference, didn’t.
I wear my heart on my sleeve. My inner thoughts got me through an unhappy and dysfunctional childhood. My daily conversation with the universe, although it brought some relief, sometimes brought disillusionment, because each day was the start of a new battle, which I mentally had to attune myself to.
Seeing my experiences unfold, confined to the book has allowed me to understand myself and my experiences with much more clarity. It has allowed me to explore my disability and bring understanding on what my neurological issues are. It has also brought about more understanding and clarity on the reasons behind why my disability was ignored.
It doesn’t change the facts behind the deed, but writing my book has allowed me to work through each individual experience so that I have the whole picture in front of me, for the first time. Without the book I could never have achieved this level of explanation and which is why writing it has been a cathartic experience.
It is because I have struggled so much that I have become an advocate of expression. It is important we get our thoughts out in a healthy, and appropriate way. It is important we are able to provide ourselves with psychological relief through expression. It is not only the right thing to do, but it is also healthier.
It doesn’t take away the injustice of what I was made to go through, or what’s been done, nor does it take away others’ responsibility, they must all reconcile their part, but it does give me acceptance and closure on my disability.