Due to the nature of my cerebral palsy and the damage around my cerebral cortex, I know I am more mentally and emotionally disabled, than I am physically.
The cerebral cortex controls both motor function and emotions, and in my case my motor skills and physical disability are relatively mild. The main issues revolve around my inability to feel emotions and my sensory issues.
There is no easy way to deal with a disability. Where one person might struggle, another with similar symptoms may not, but how we mentally think around our disability and the nature of what a disability is and how it can make us feel day to day, can make it hard for us to fit in. I don’t think one element is harder than the other, I just think they’re different.
I talk about my intuition a lot because I use that as compensation for my lack of mental acumen because of my disability. I use it in the context of my emotions and to gauge or anticipate how others might feel, or think. I also use it to read other people’s emotions and manage my thoughts constructively. I say thoughts, rather than feelings, because that is what they are. They’re just thoughts.
The extensive damage to the cerebral cortex means I struggle with my emotional feelings, as they are impaired. Also, because of my autism it is easy for me to lock myself away. Inevitably I retreat into my own little world. My intuition acts as my guide and helps me work things out where my brain isn’t able to do it.
I choose to adapt, to try to find acceptance with everything I deal with. Life becomes harder if I don’t. I must fit my life around my disability, as others must try to fit into mine.