Nearly eight years on and out of everything I’ve had to deal with since I started my ‘knowing’ journey, my handwriting is the only thing I haven’t tackled yet. I haven’t talked about my handwriting, although I mentioned its existence in ‘My Story’ when I first started the Diary.
It’s one of those things we learn as a child and then subconsciously just do it. We don’t even have to think about it, but with technology now ‘a thing’ we probably write less anyway. I usually get around the problem by typing my blogs up in draft, then when I’m happy with their content, they get published to the ‘live site.’
Sadly, my brain damage stops me from forming my letters together. Another problem is that if someone speaks too quickly as I’m trying to write, my brain not only has trouble interpreting what I hear at the speed it’s given, but I also struggle to form the outlines. As explained by my Consultant this is due to a non-dominant parietal lobe problem.
I also write at snail’s pace. In school my writing was too small, but perhaps that’s got something to do with the outlines being small enough for me to form them, without them being a problem. It didn’t matter how many times I got shouted at or told to write larger and quicker, I still couldn’t and no teacher stopped to question why.
Now that I’ve managed to make the outlines slightly bigger, they’re not properly formed. I have always struggled with this, but it also didn’t help that my father used to stand behind me telling me to stop dragging my leg and walk heel toe.
There are times where I feel incredibly stupid that something so basic is something I struggle with, but perhaps I’m struggling more with the injustice of how I got to this place yet again.