There is no doubt in my mind that I would still be struggling to understand or talk about my experiences if I hadn’t started The CP Diary. The CP Diary is a place I come to, so I can talk about my experiences.
I liken my experiences to someone who is finally able to walk free for the first time, having been kept in the dark for 46 years. I think it remarkable that I’m choosing to see my life as positive, as I continue to document my experiences as they happened.
It doesn’t get those others off the hook. They must take stock and come to understand how they could and should have done things differently with me. Those who allow others to go through very difficult circumstances, where they could make their lives easier, never usually accept or look at themselves in the mirror, long enough to understand the part they played.
When any child is born with special needs, they are special needs no matter how small their needs are. All family members must rally round and in most cases do. And for the special needs child, their life isn’t just about the difficulties they face, but the emotional support that is brought about through the support from their families.
Without my website, my life would look and feel very different. My Diary helps me work through my thoughts and feelings, so that I can bring understanding into the equation on all the experiences I talk about. Without my website, I would still be left in the dark, but the irony is I was always going to find out.
When it comes to a disability, the disability shouldn’t be secret. Because it goes against how the Universe expects us to behave, where secrets aren’t supposed to be secret, the Universe will always find a way to correct that situation.
On my part, I am simply trying not to hold on to the negativity surrounding my ‘secret’ disability and that’s where my Diary comes in.