Overcoming anxiety

Although I deal with anxiety, and I choose not to be defined by it, it can be difficult to control because I have autism. Other people’s stories may be different. Anxiety is something I manage.

Maybe you were anxious child who is now an anxious adult, or maybe you’ve been through a bad experience and you developed anxiety later in life. But however, you get to deal with anxiety, it is possible that your mind is now in continual overdrive.

Everything we think and feel is based on our perceptions and attitudes which are centred around anxiety. Anxiety is based on worries that may or may not happen. But when it comes to worry, perhaps you should ask ourselves, what would be the worst thing that could happen, and if it does happen, what will you do?

Although we will all deal with anxiety differently, the biggest issue around anxiety is our inflexible, rigid and concrete mindset. With autism it’s near to impossible to correct that. To help with anxiety, look for exceptions, where scenarios may be all-black or all-white.

We must try to understand each situation in its wider context without our thinking going into overdrive. We mustn’t assume. We must think outside the box.

For example, ‘we assume our best friend isn’t turning up because of something we’ve said, when in fact there may be a problem with work and she’s having to work overtime, or something has cropped up with a family member, but didn’t manage to call.’

We tend to live with assume, but we need to think about the fact that there will always be a logical reason. Nothing should be a worry until we know, and we have something to worry about.

That will help us temporarily overcome how we feel about anxiety, but the key is also in how we learn to handle it.


12 Oct, 2019

4 thoughts on “Overcoming anxiety

  1. It’s probably helpful for us to understand our fears, since that is what anxiety feeds on. I’m certainly guilty of anticipating the worst way too often.

    Or perhaps I need to figure out what is real and what is not.

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, and you’re right, but I am probably more guilty than you. Having autism makes it impossible for me to to separate fact from fiction.

      How do you eventually get past that? I use my intuition and that works, but it’s not always there when I need it.

      1. I normally get past that by preparing myself to have a face-to-face confrontation with fear. I accept what could be.

        Of course, I’m praying to the universe that I’m wrong at the same time.

        1. Thanks Tim. I love your response.

          Yes, ‘preparing myself to have a face-to-face confrontation with fear.’ Although it’s not a conversation we want to have, it’s the right thing to do.

          Working through your permutations beforehand will help you understand whether you have anything to be fearful of and that will make it less scary.

          Any outcome we haven’t accommodated for, can leave us with a sense of trepidation and that’s when we mentally run, but facing the music is always preferable to running. Our problems go with us, no one has an option on that.

          The ‘universe’ will always try to help where it can, but it cannot always help. It usually depends on who else is involved and what they have done, and that changes the status quo.

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