I had a little bit of an up and down day yesterday and it seems to have marred my mood this morning. Having watched my daughter take part in her first Race for Life UK, Cancer Research event; brought back bittersweet thoughts about my own struggles with Cerebral Palsy. It’s become more spastic today and I just hate that.
It was a long way back to the car and as I struggled to walk in the 26c heat, I started to feel sorry for myself and began to ask the same questions. Why did I have to deal with Cerebral Palsy and why do I have to feel like this? I wanted to be back in that familiar place, until such a time I could deal with those familiar feelings.
Of course, I am immensely proud that my daughter is doing all these things. I encourage her and she has my total support. I however, must find acceptance on my experiences. Inevitably, something always comes along to change the way I think and feel about things, then I find myself having to build my emotions back up again.
As I see my family taking charge of their health, I sit back and contemplate my own. I need to be more pro-active and although I don’t see myself as being unhealthy, I know I have minor set-backs with a disability to deal with.
It would be interesting to know if there is anyone out there who has reached 70 and is still healthy; living with CP. That would make me so happy. It would also take the pressure off any doubts I have living with Cerebral Palsy.