Reflecting on 2019

It’s that time of year again when I get to reflect on my blog. Now with a published book also behind me that has taken three and a half years to complete, I am completely at ease with everything.

For me to be able to contain my thoughts growing up over a disability I didn’t know I had until I was 46, the book has given me closure in a way my blog never could. I am irritated my disability remained buried, I am thankful the book openly gives me the opportunity to talk about my life.

The book goes into detail on my life and explains my cerebral palsy story in a way that the blog doesn’t. My blog is mental health, wellbeing and lifestyle, the book talks about my life.

With ‘advance copies’ of the book now in my possession, my thoughts go to another year. With an official publication date set for the 2nd January 2020, the enormity of what I have achieved isn’t sinking in and that’s okay. For me it’s probably best that it doesn’t.

With signs from mum that she approves of the book, my thoughts go to her. I know that if our circumstances had been different, I would have known about my disability. Through the book I understand now why I wasn’t told. It must have been difficult for her to live with the guilt, yet she selflessly still tried to help. She never gave up on me, insisting I do my daily exercises, to my annoyance and irritation.

It would never have been possible or achievable for me to understand my life without writing it the book, it is the only reason I wrote it. I would never have come to know what I know now about my disability without it and I couldn’t be happier with the results. It’s a beautiful, heartfelt book.

For those people who have struggled this year, I hope next year will be easier, and for those who have struggled less, I hope the trend continues. I want to say a ‘big thank you’ for all the love and support you’ve given me over the year. I couldn’t do what I do with my blog without your love and support.

31 Dec, 2019

6 thoughts on “Reflecting on 2019

  1. I am pleased you have written about your life around the publication of your book. It is clear that writing it has been cathartic and has provided you with some closure. 2019 has certainly been a hugely important year for you.

    I would like to wish everyone peace, love, health, and happiness in 2020. I am grateful for The CP Diary community of amazing people.

    1. Thank you. Yes, ‘I am grateful for The CP Diary community of amazing people.’ Yes they certainly are.

      Given my life and ‘my story’ it was the only way I could bring order into a somewhat difficult and chaotic life, growing up not knowing about something I should have been made aware of.

      Not keeping the attention on me, instead I shall turn my attentions to 2020. Turning to what is going on in the world, it needs to be a year in which differences are put aside with us all working together.

  2. Wow, where do I even begin? 2019 was a wild and crazy year to put it mildly. I finally decided that I wasn’t going to be treated poorly by anyone and walked away from my entire life to start a new one.

    It was definitely one of the hardest things for me to do, but I knew that there wasn’t any choice by the end of it. I’m so very grateful that I was still able to be supportive of you and you writing your book, which is finally happening.

    I’m also more than happy to help you out in any way possible to bring your book to the world, so that everybody will have the chance to read it.

    I’m hoping and praying that 2020 will be a much better year.

    1. Thanks Randy. You’ll be a much stronger person for it. Well done. It was the right thing for you to do.

      I am so grateful for your support. I couldn’t do what I do without your support and I thank you for it. ‘I’m also more than happy to help you out in any way possible to bring your book to the world’ – that is much appreciated Randy.

      Keep focused Randy in 2020. I know how far you’ve come, now you must believe it for yourself Randy. You’re better than you think, you know.

  3. The CP Dairy community is grateful for you too, Ilana. Happy New Year!

    I’m waiting for your next book in 2020.

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