I’ve blogged about calling a spade a spade and talked about black and white scenario’s before, but wanted to do a blog inclusive of both. I believe they are inextricably linked and form the bigger picture of our lifestyle choices, depending on how we choose to see things.
Growing up I was more observing of my life and through those observations, I became more adept at noticing certain behaviour patterns. Calling a spade a spade, and seeing black and white scenarios, means we get to call the shots exactly how we see them, not how we would like those shots to be, but that can work against us for obvious reasons.
I was born into the life I had and simply had to get on with it. With any childhood, good or bad, peaceful, neglectful or abusive, we live that life, until we’re able to change it. Of course, if we’re one of the lucky ones to be born into a family without neglect or abuse, we get to see a more balanced view as an adult.
Regardless of our upbringing and our formative years, they become our most profound, because it’s when the foundations are set for our adult lives. I believe that when we grow up in a family around issues involving neglect, we eventually learn how things should be done, but for us to learn, we must become consciously aware, or the patterns of neglect will repeat with us. What we learn is not to sugar coat our lives, as we begin to see life more clearly.
For anyone dealing with abuse in their formative years, moving forward the vision may be slightly blurred and although we may see some of what we’re dealing with, we’re not always linked in, enough to understand or make the correlations. Unfortunately, not all of us make the link until much later.
Of course, the more aware of neglect, or abuse we deal with, the more chance we have of changing our life further down the line.