As a child, I was always a people pleaser. I used to go out of my way to please everyone. Although I know looking for acceptance was the reason why, in hindsight I can see it didn’t do me any favours.
What started off as a kind gesture on my part, became a habit to everyone else, because they knew I could never say no. What’s more, it seemed contagious because it didn’t always stop with one person. I just wasn’t assertive enough.
But just because someone isn’t good at saying no, doesn’t mean others should take advantage. It also doesn’t put that person in a particularly good light. I was manipulated into doing things, because I was too soft.
As soon as my attitude changed, things began to change. Our attitude sets the tone. The more positive your attitude, the less likely others will take advantage, the more you’ll be able to stand up for yourself. And although confidence plays its part too, a permanent change of attitude is necessary.
We need to say no and must challenge ourselves to change. The new ‘me’ found a voice. If I choose to do something now I’ll do it, just as I choose not to do something. I dictate my own shots.