Taking advice

Have you noticed how people aren’t inclined to take advice, even when the advice is free or offered with love and sincerity?

I think the problem most of us have is that because we haven’t thought those thoughts first, we’re somehow aggrieved that someone else is advising us how to do things. It would be positive for us to be able to accept advice from others who see things from a slightly different perspective.

We’re often stubborn by nature and don’t like to give others credit for something we would have liked to have thought about first and yet if the shoe were on the other foot we’d be happy to hand out advice so that someone else could benefit from our wisdom.

For us to grow spiritually we need to see and perceive our world and the people in it, differently. When we’re not happy to accept other people’s advice, we begin to stagnate emotionally, in effect blocking out all new thoughts that would in effect help us change our lives in some way.

I find it fascinating that there are plenty of books out there in libraries and book stores which we’re happy to buy and seek advice from and yet when it comes to taking advice from people, we’re less than happy to accept their advice whether we find their advice helpful or not.

Perhaps it’s the fact that others have found what makes them successful and we haven’t. What we don’t always know is how long it took that person to get to that stage. Perhaps we’re not as successful so subconsciously we’re not happy that those people have made a success of themselves.

If the advice, we got was given by someone whom also struggled, we’d be more inclined to listen to them. We hate it when we’re not successful, but we don’t like it when someone else is.

5 Dec, 2011

10 thoughts on “Taking advice

  1. This first line is me.

    Wow you fully described why I don’t usually accept advice off some people no matter what the advice. This is kind of creepy how true this is for me.

    I hate to admit I’m like this when it comes to advice. Wow I’m showing my partner.

    1. I think many of us will see this in ourselves. It’s life… no one likes being told what to do; or we think we’re being told what to do!

      I was like this as a child, but my upbringing had a lot to do with it. Pleased my blog helped.

  2. You really seem to have hit the nail on the head.

    I’m not the best at taking advice. I think it stems mostly because I never really got any when growing up so I’m used to listening to myself, not others.

    I’m certainly better at giving advice than taking it, but I’m working on it.

    1. You’re probably not on your own there. I am sure there are many of us that are better at handing out advice than receiving it. I also believe spiritually taking advice helps us grow and will help us in the long term form better and closer relationships.

      Pleased you’re working on it, that always helps.

  3. I tend to drum to my own drummer.

    Usually when a family member is giving me advice it is usually preceded with you are not doing that right. There is criticism given before the advice, which makes it very negative.

    Yes I am very stubborn getting that from both sides of the house. If I dig in my heels there is no changing my mind.

    1. It sounds like a coping mechanism Randy. I don’t believe for one minute you wouldn’t be open to suggestions, if you felt those suggestions were just and helpful.

      We tend to close ranks when we feel challenged in some way. Sad but true. I’m sure you’d be different with others who didn’t behave that way.

  4. Yes I agree with you.

    I gladly listen and take advice from others. Sometimes I don’t use it though, but I have nothing against someone offering it to me. I know I could use all the help I can get.

    1. That’s good Lisa. I am pleased you’re happy to listen to what others have to say even if you don’t use their advice.

      I’m just wondering though if you use more of the advice than you think you do, even if you’re not putting that advice to use now. I am sure we’ve all done that, then changed things.

  5. I know I’m not very good at following advice, even when deep down I know it’s the best thing for me.

    I’m sure it stems from growing up always being told what to do. Now if I could just learn to listen more often, I’m sure that would be a lot more helpful!

    1. I believe you’re right Randy.

      I believe a lot of our listening skills including taking advice from others do come from childhood and you’re right again; others who give us help and advice would make our lives a lot more helpful, particularly if the advice helps us to change our lives for the better in some way.

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