Taking sides

I’m not sure it matters whether you’re the child, the parent, or the grandparent. It’s not something families stop doing and although it’s not something they will consciously encourage, it’s there and is something that still, continues to be part of the family scenario. I’m talking about taking one person’s opinion over another.

Unless we learn to understand the human condition, we will always take sides and sitting on the fence shouldn’t be an option either. It’s something we learn. It is what parents do, it is what children do, it is what grandparents will do.

In larger families, siblings will often take sides and children will take sides over their parents. Friends also do it, taking sides over friends and so it continues. I believe family dynamics has become responsible for this. To understand how family and friendship dynamics works, is to change the way we see and interact with each other completely.

We mustn’t take sides. We must learn to be objective. It shouldn’t matter the explanation or whose explanation it is.  We must go with what’s right and just, even if it means taking a different stance.


23 Jul, 2015

2 thoughts on “Taking sides

  1. I can remember as a child in the early 70’s watching a TV show called, “Wait till your father gets home.” There was never anything for me to worry about, as I was fortunate my parents never took sides, as neither parented me!

    I agree we should be objective and not take one person’s opinion over another, but this brings difficulties as we are often expected to support and take sides and that can cause friction, when we know that person with that expectation is in the wrong.

    I know many families who takes sides for a quiet life and the pressure is always there to do that, but I agree even if it means falling out, I think we will earn more respect if we stand by a judgement of what is right and wrong.

    1. Thanks. Yes I believe it’s wrong. Taking sides from my own experiences splits families, relationships and communication.

      Unfortunately we will also lose the respect of the person taking sides, particularly if the person they’re taking sides with is clearly wrong. I agree that we will earn more respect if we go with what’s right, not what is expected.

      It is right to support of course, but never right to support and take sides where it’s clearly not appropriate. We must try to be more objective in our approach.

      We mustn’t take sides. From my own experience in the short term it doesn’t help because there is a lot of falling out, but in the longer term I believe the respect element will always pay off, even if it’s not there at that particular time.

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